Berry Rubin - "The Last of the Tough Guys"My father, Berry Rubin, passed away Tuesday, March 24th. He was 63 years old and had lived with cancer for two years.
Why a Tough Guy?
My cousin coined my father "the Last of the Tough Guys."
The anecdotes leading up to that name are many, but the moment of inspiration seems to be the way he picked up the newspaper in the dead of Michigan's winter...
Michigan's winters are cold, and icy, and windy. When my cousin and I were in high-school, it was a morning ritual to head outside in the dark morning, and chip our cars out from under a layer of ice. We'd do this in full winter gear; hats, gloves, and thick coats.
On some mornings, in the midst of all this chipping and freezing, my father would saunter out in shorts and a T-shirt, with no shoes at all, to pick up the morning paper.
He'd then stand there and talk with us about whatever was on his mind at 6:45 in the morning.
And so my cousin started calling him "the Last of the Tough Guys." A tough guy for the shorts and no shoes, and "last" for drama.
The Real Tough Guy
Of course it takes more than cold tolerance to be a real tough guy. Penguins live in the Antarctic, and nobody calls them tough guys.
These are the things that really made him a tough guy to me, and the people who knew him:
He never quit giving.
When it came to helping, no matter the time, distance, or effort, if somebody needed the help, my father made sure they got it.
He made a tradition of giving pastries to all the staff and patients of his physical therapy clinic, regardless of how his own treatment was going.
He never complained - outside of a restaurant.
My father, like everybody, had many setbacks. I never once heard him blame others for his misfortune.
At the same time, I don't think he ever ordered a meal at a restaurant without sending it back because it was too cold, even if it was glowing hot. Even if he didn't order anything, he made sure somebody's plate got sent back to the kitchen.
He always ended up positive.
My father, like everyone, got knocked down and depressed from time to time. He always bounced back to being positive quickly, and didn't get stuck feeling down.
I remember when I called him one weekend after he had been moved from the physical therapy clinic back to the cancer ward because his situation had deteriorated. He told me he had the clinic put in a bar over his bed so he could maintain his upper-body strength, which was what allowed him his mobility after he lost control of his legs.
The Last?
There's still tough guys out there in the world.
There's still plenty of people out there taking on their own personal struggles, and fighting hard even when the odds are against them.
There's still people helping others, and then going the extra mile to make it a gift of friendship instead of charity.
There's still people looking forward and saying "what can I do now?" instead of looking back with "what happened to me?"
So who's going to be the next "Last of the Tough Guys"?
They've got a lot to live up to, but I'm sure I'll meet that person some day.
The Oxfam Trailwalker is part of my trek towards the title, I look forward to hearing about yours.
Great Times in Tachikawa!
Continuing west to Shoto-san you start finding some steep inclines & rough trails. 
